PODGODZ 293

Podgodz 293: The Flash: Pilot (1990)

Recorded 19 June 2018

Nerdface rage

Incredibles 2

Legion S2

 

20 September, 1990

Forensic scientist Barry Allen is struck by lightning and doused in chemical products that afford him superhuman speed, which he learns to control with help from Tina McGee, a scientist from S.T.A.R. Labs. When Barry’s brother, policeman Jay Allen, is murdered by his corrupt ex-partner, Nicholas Pike, the leader of a vicious motorcycle gang of criminals, Barry uses his newfound abilities to bring Pike and his men to justice and decides to continue protecting Central City as “The Flash”.

 

My thoughts in Twitter DMs

 

Oh god they can’t act. Least threatening biker gang ever. Brother either dies or is in charge of said bikers. No wonder it didn’t go, Paula ‘Show Killer’ Marshall is in it.

 

Used the standard sfx “paging Dr Blair”

 

The directors are hacks, or schizophrenic, two really different styles.

 

So, biker lord is a communist. Okay.

 

Hah, the coffee break station has a toaster oven.

 

It’s like it was made by someone who had been told to copy Batman (89) but that had only had it described third hand and was given no budget.

 

Paula Marshall looks like a reject friend from Blossom. Don’t worry about breaking up, we wrote you out after the pilot show killer.

 

A rotary payphone?

 

“We paid Elfman for those music stings, I don’t care how out of place they are, you use them!”

 

The 90s are as bad as the 70s.

 

“I need more neon accent lights!” “Can’t afford’em, spent too much on Elfman.”

 

Convenient bad guy was watching the news report on video tape so he could hit pause.

 

Curse you Elfman! [shakes fist] That was my effects budget!

 

We want it to be exactly like Batman (89) but we also want it to be exactly Superman (78). Oh, and Blossom. Make it also look exactly like Blossom, Batman, and Superman! [Giant cocaine snort]

 

That isn’t how sonic booms work.

 

Wait, the gang members are “Phil and Steve?” Were Larry and Bob busy?

 

Ewwww, Show Killer looks 15 and he looks like a 40 year old gay guy!

 

No wonder I was watching The Simpsons along with everyone else.

 

Put it back in your pants Flash, I know how you die, you drop your ice cream and die fumbling for it in a head on collision!

Next time we watch….Porky’s (81/82)

Time to put the Crown Royal sack back on the microphone.

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Time to put the Crown Royal sack back on the microphone.

Music Provided by Rucka Rucka Ali, Check out his work at RukasWorld and possibly commission him for your next project.

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