PODGODZ 291

Podgodz 291: Used Cars (1980)

Recorded 06 June 2018

Further thoughts on Solo

 

Are you ready to see Betty Thomas’s tits?

 

So, a personal movie for me.

 

Yes, the 70s were a shitty and dark time. Those dark times continued on until the 80s.

 

A nice cinematic opening on a used car lot as a man rolls back the odometer of a car and we meet our star, Kurt Russell.

 

Credits montage of shady dealings, all very well told without a word of dialogue.

 

The back story, the Fuchs brothers seem to hate each other, they have car dealerships across from each other.

 

Hello 80s racism, the sleazy Mexican car supplier that just mentions he has 254 cars available.

 

Other salesman doesn’t like red cars and is very superstitious. There is a very cute dog though.

 

Oh, and Kurt Russel wants to run for the State Senate.

 

Evil Fuchs finds out the politicians he bought did not stay bought, the highway off ramp is going through his lot. If only he could get his brothers  property.

 

Somehow in this time, consumer protection agencies are roaming the land waiting to take down sleazy operators.  But Kurt needs to get 10 grand to get the nomination landed and then he’s in.

 

Side note: the car that Kurt wants to sell to the school board are the cars from Grease.

 

Luke Fuchs also has a heart condition, and has to take nitro pills so that he doesn’t die. He also makes Kurt to promise that his brother doesn’t get the land.

 

Evil Fuch has a plan, get his new mechanic, who drive demolition derby, to kill his brother in a test drive. Yeah, it actually works but not before wee find out his daughter is coming back into town.

 

Kurt and the boys decide it’s best to hide the death, they burry him in an Edsel in the pit and tell everyone he went to Florida because you can’t prosecute a company unless you can find the owner…right?

 

Then we cut to Lenny and Squiggy, who are pirate broadcasters. They break into a football game with an ad. The edit cuts out the penis nose glasses over googly eyes, but the car is read so the salesman freaks out a little and we end up seeing a kind of rapey show of tits as the models dress is ripped off so we get to see her tits, as does the TV audience, as well as some swearing.

 

Yes, a feel is even copped on camera.

 

Of course this works so well that Jim the mechanic is even roped into sales. The lot is jammed with leads.

 

Cut t later, the evil Fuchs has a circus themed event, for some reason the lot across the street is dark…until the music and lights come up and we see they have strippers which draws over the family crowd from the circus and also causes many accidents.

 

Oh no, the disco dancers are all strippers, and there are Betty Thomas’s tits.

 

Later at Kurt’s trailer, he plays Hail to the Chief and has a picture of the White House. Also, a fuck ton of celery and Coors light.

 

He has an answering machine, all the ladies want his dick.

 

The only way to counter an add calling them scum? Hijack the Presidential Address and be on all three networks!

 

Clearly the broad that walks on the lot has to be with a government agency! Nope, she used to be, but she is Lukes daughter.

 

Gotta wine and dine her while the pirate broadcast goes down. Of course the person beside them has a portable TV so they have to end up outside, where he has to accost her because of course they are in front of a TV store window.

 

The ad is basically the other salesman shooting Roys cars while dressed as a cowboy, even the Mercedes which he just blows up with dynamite.

 

Cut to them pinning the blame on those Iranian students to the FBI.

 

Roy  knows who is to blame, and beets the shit out of Jeff, and when seeing a picture realizes the pit has been filled in so that is surely where Luke has been buried.

 

They call Kurt, who picks up after the answering machine has picked up, which means she can then listen and hear that her father is dead and buried int he Edsel.

 

All the cops come with a warrant to dig for the car.

 

Instead they have doused in gasoline and have it drive into a transformer and he explodes.

 

Barbara just wants the truth, but Kurt has to lie so gets fired.

 

Kurt can only make his money by betting on a football game, it’s now needed tomorrow. Hey, that’s when they are going to announce the highway too! We also find out the 250 sophomores haven’t had any drivers training because all the cars broke down.

 

Now some comedy as the broad tries to do a mans job, but can’t. They even edit her commercial to very poorly say she has miles of cars, which has to be be proved by Al Lewis as the judge.

 

Turns out a mile of cars would be about 250. How could all these established facts all come into play?

 

Kurt bet against Jeff. They buy 250 cars from the Mexican stereotype, and get the 250 students to drive them to the lot. Did Jeff get put into a car that turned out to be red? You betcha. Was there a fist fight on the back of a moving jacked up truck? You bet!

 

Did the Mexican stereotype cop a feel? He sure did, he also has some maijuanna to sell.

 

The day, it is saved by a license plate.

 

All this movie needed was a freeze frame and some captions of where they ended up.

Don’t forget that we are a listener supported show…blah blah…Crown Royal sack.

Don’t forget that we are a listener supported show.

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Time to put the Crown Royal sack back on the microphone.

Music Provided by Rucka Rucka Ali, Check out his work at RukasWorld and possibly commission him for your next project.

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